Is it possible for one person to actually cause natural disasters every where they go? True natural disasters – like avalanches, blizzards and sandstorms? Really really big sandstorms? Like in The Mummy? In fact, the really big sandstorm is all i can remember from that movie. That, and Brendan Fraser, who i have a love/hate […]
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The 1970’s were all about staying alive. (Staying alive. Staying alive.) But maybe we didn’t know it then. Lately, i’ve been noticing all the things we did on purpose in the 1970’s that we know now WILL KILL YOU. And at the risk of sounding like grandpa mourning the loss of the good ol’ days when doctors […]
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i’m standing at the pharmacy counter, feeling like megadeath and buying my prescriptions. And when i say “megadeath”, i mean as in death-warmed-over/undead/please-kill-me-now dead. Not Megadeth, the awesome metal band, which, despite their whining about how Metallica stole all their stuff, always make me want to jump in a mosh pit and bang my head […]
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i have come to the last day of my life and it is time to contemplate all that i have done and all that i have left to do. i have seen the doctor and he has diagnosed me with an incurable, fatal disease that will steal all happiness from the world and slowly eat […]
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Today i blew my nose so hard i got vertigo and fell off the toilet into a pile of cats. Now, That’s something you don’t say every day. i bet you could go your whole life and not have that happen to you. Maybe. i don’t know. It seemed pretty easy to me. What […]
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i have been down for days with the mother-of-all chest colds. i really should have seen it coming. i spent all winter at first marveling about how i managed to dodge everybody else’s bugs and then practically bragging about my awesome autoimmune skills. i mean, my two office mates were out with major viruses twice and […]
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i may seem slightly preoccupied with bugs these days. To be more specific… it might seem i’m more than slightly preoccupied with COCKROACHES who are another category of “bug” altogether. There are bugs that border on cute, like ladybugs or that bug in A Bug’s Life (which is still one of my favorite Disney/Pixar movies […]
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There are days and then there are DAYS, where i make procrastination into an art form. DAYS when i just don’t have it in me to do anything productive even though i have the time, all of my basic survival needs are met and i am in optimal health. Good health. Ok..’decent’…but above ‘alarming’. Mostly. […]
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Hello, i’m candice and i am a sugar junkie. At least, that’s what the Man, my good friends and my scale all say. Two out of three of those also say sugar is a drug. (i don’t know what the scale says. It’s not talking anymore. It may or may not have suffered some damage […]
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But science still sucks. i just learned that facial expressions don’t accurately convey emotions from top ranked neuroscientist, Lisa Feldman Barrett, who uses actual SCIENCE to figure stuff out instead of Facebook feeds and Gut Instincts which i capitalize, because, that’s pretty much my own M.O. and it ROCKS. i’m totally F-I-E-R-C-E. Dude. But i don’t […]
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